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 thank you in advance for the help!! :)
Creator: Morgan Harper Nichols. 
Source: Garden 24


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  1. Hi Gabby! I thought your first story was so cute! The idea of rewriting the fairy tale with a lighthearted twist was very fun and playful, and I loved the dogs as well! I was a little confused seeing the story at first without the introduction to tie together the concept of of your storyboard, but I can't wait to read it later! Aside from Josie and Bailey in the story, was there any other backstory for the other two dogs? If you ever wanted to write a sequel to this story I think it would be interesting to see how all four of them interact. My only suggestion is clarifying how Josie not getting her toy translated to her getting something even better (a best friend)! I made the connection after reading the author's note but I was a little difficult to connect at first! I think it would help to emphasize Josie wanting a specific toy at the beginning, rather than focusing on all 3 of the pups! Overall, great job!

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    1. I just realized that this could very well be a portfolio and not a storybook, which explains why there isn't an introduction. My bad! You can ignore the part about the intro, I was confused!

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  2. Hi Gabby! First of all, I love the characters. This is a fun twist on a storybook all of us know. I already knew that I was going to love the story. I think that it is really cool how you took them out of the context of a normal setting. The story is normally seen with people and I like that you took it in a completely different direction. You have an amazing talent for telling a story because I smiled all throughout it. I like, also, how you change the ending. The storybook creates a darker end but yours remains little and friendly the whole time. If each of the storybooks is written in this similar fashion, I think your portfolio will be really well done! I love the happy ending of putting them together. It kept the story line very similar to the actual book but not enough that it was not a new read.

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  3. Hi Gabby! Really cool theme on your blog and project, first off. The banner image for your project is so beautiful! It's my favorite one that I can remember. I can't recall seeing a title like this for a project before. This captured my attention before reading your first story. I liked the light-hearted mood of your story. It was a pleasant way to start off my day :) Three dogs sure sounds like a handful! I loved the part where you mentioned Katy's familiar feeling of wanting another dog. This is all too familiar! The way you described Bailey reminded me of my old dog, named Ginger. Ginger was a great dog--very timid though, which you captured while describing Bailey. I loved seeing the chemistry between Bailey and Josie. The ending was so happy! Great story. I love how stories about dogs can bring back happy memories and feelings. They are really special animals! Keep up the good work!

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  4. Hi Habby! I think your project is off to such a great start! I loved the hand drawn puppy image as your banner image for the story! It's so adorable! Your first story is looking so great and I love the spin you took on the traditional Beauty and the Beast story! The puppy characters are fun, modern, and just so cute! I have to say though, I was a little confused in the beginning with that your story was going to be about without the introduction. I think adding that feature in will really help tie everything together nicely. Also, what made you decide on the title "1, 2, 3?" Does it have to do with the three dogs?" Maybe in your introduction include a sneak peak on what got you to that title! Overall, I truly enjoyed your story and your creativity! I appreciated how you adapted your story to include a happy ending because I don't think a dark ending would have been complementary! Keep up the good work and I look forward to reading the rest of your stories!

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  5. Hi Gabby! Wow the introduction paragraph on your 'Finding Pambe's Paradise' was really captivating. I love how you used the typical half fish, half human mermaid tale but put a more modern and up-to-date spin on it. I especially like that you wait to describe what paradise is until the second paragraph. Also, writing in the first person really fit well in your story. I can tell you added a bit of an ego to her character, especially when she said how easy it would be to make a man fall in love with her. Overall I thought your story flowed well and was a good, light-hearted read. Your first story 'three squeaky balls' was also incredibly fun to read. I'm a huge dog lover so I enjoyed every sentence of it. I really like the theme you picked for your website as well- it's light and airy and ties to your stories well. Great job!

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  6. Hi Gabby,

    First of all, my initial impressions were very pleasing! I love the colors of your homepage with the pretty clouds! However, I am very confused by the title. It makes me think that this was your test site that you could play around with before starting your actual site. But if this title is supposed to somehow relate to your stories, then I would suggest maybe explaining what the title means and how it relates to your portfolio on the front page.

    I really enjoyed both of your stories, especially "Finding Pambe's Paradise." I love how you incorporated multiple pictures throughout the text. It really breaks up all of the words and is nice for the readers to look at. Also, the header picture blew me away with how beautiful it was! But, so did your writing! You are a fantastic writer and I cannot wait to read more of your portfolio this semester!

    -Libby

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  7. Hi Gabby :)
    First off, I really like the title of your portfolio. It grabbed my attention right away! For both of your stories, I really liked the characters. They're all very fun and light hearted. I also love how they all get happy endings. The way you incorporate your pictures into your stories is really wonderful, especially in "Finding Pambe's Paradise." I personally have a little trouble adding the pictures, so it's great when I see people who don't have as much trouble as I do!
    The only thing I would say need a little tweaking are your sentences and paragraph structures. You tend to lean toward run-on sentences which can be a little confusing to follow. I recommend breaking them up a little. Varying sentence length between short, medium, and long is a great way to make it easier for your audience to follow your story. It also helps your great stories flow better!
    Most of your paragraphs tend to be blocks of text, as well. Don't be afraid to to have short paragraphs that are only two or three sentences long, the variation makes for great reading and helps it flow better for the reader as well.
    (I actually have the opposite problem of having too many short paragraphs in a row, lol.)
    But your stories as a whole are great! Your characters are vivid, and the third story is going to be awesome :)

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  8. Hello Gabby,

    I agree with the other people in the comments, you have a beautiful website. It's bright and happy looking. The heading images don't seem to go with your stories, but it makes your site look cohesive. I'm guessing that you have a portfolio, so linking the stories together by having a similar aesthetic theme is a nice idea. I also liked your other use of pictures. They add to your story and make your page interesting to look at!
    On to suggestions, first, I don't understand your title. I thought it would be story 1, 2, and 3, but they are backwards on your navigation panel. The go home, 2, 1 Maybe you could rearrange the order or a a bit to the title. Like, Testing 1-2-3: "(subtitle here)"
    The stories were great to read, but I think you could add in more dialogue, especially in "Pambe's Paradise" it's a lot of the character's thinking/narration, so it might be nice to break it up with some speaking lines! There are a few, but I think it would add more action to the story if you created some dialogue between Pambe and another character (maybe the fisherman?).
    Good work, I'm excited to read your next story!

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  9. Hi Gabby!

    I absolutely love your website! I think it is nicely decorated and looks professional. I think it is easy to navigate, which is great for classmates. I also skimmed through your stories and I liked the ones you have chosen to write about. I also personally love the touches of purple on your website because purple is one of my favorite colors. Also, I really enjoyed reading your first story. I am a big fan of fairy tales so it was fun for me to read your story and see what you changed to the story from its' original form. I think you did a great job re-writting the story because it was very clear and an easy read. I think you are a great writer and it is fun for me to get to read my classmates work. I hope you have enjoyed the semester and this class so far. Great job with your stories and website. I love it all!

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  10. Hi Gabby!
    Your website is so colorful and has some great pictures added to it! I just have a few comments regarding the formatting of it. On the top, story 2 comes before story 1.I didn't know if you meant it to be that way, but it could be a little confusing for readers when they come across your page. On the home page I tried navigating to the stories you wrote, but the links unfortunately didn't work and take me to the stories. It could be a fault on my end though. For your first story, it is the first fairy tail I have read for the class and I really enjoyed it. The characters in your story had fun personalities! You really showcased their personalities in your stories through your writing well. The photos and the youtube videos made "Pambe's Paradise" come to life and I thought it was a great addition. Looking forward to the rest of your stories!

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  11. Hi Gabby!

    I love the look of your Project. All of your cover photos are very relaxing and comforting. It gives a warm, inviting feel to your website. Your first story was so cute! I also read The Three Roses for one of my stories earlier this semester, and I love your take on it. I'm a big fan of dogs, so I enjoyed how your first story was very dog-centric. Did you consider maybe sharing the reactions of Sarah and Sofia when Bailey came home? They don't like when new people come to the house, but what about new dogs? Maybe the relationship of those three dogs could be explored as well.

    The mermaid's situation reminds me a lot of the Beast's situation from "Beauty and the Beast". They are both punished in order to learn a lesson and see a new perspective. Both are creatures that have to somehow find love with a human. I loved that movie as a kid (and I even played the Beast in my middle school production of the musical). Great job on your Project so far! I look forward to seeing the stories you write in the future!

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  12. Hi Gabby!
    I loved your first story so much! I'm a huge dog lover so I immediately resonated with the main character Katy! I honestly loved that she spoiled her pups so much because I would do the same! As soon as the story said she was going to the pet store I had a feeling she'd end up with a new dog because I know I have to avoid the pets knowing I would leave with one too. I was so sad for Bailey when she found him all alone! I didn't want Katy to leave without him, so I'm happy she finally went back for him! I think the only things I wish there were more of is a little more explanation of Katy's dogs so I could visualize them better! And then maybe a little background of how she got them? She seemed to have a huge heart for lost Bailey so I was wondering if she rescued her other pups! But your story was great!

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